I am not good at goodbyes. I get too emotional normally or just don't think about it at all and pretend its not happening. Last time I said goodbye to these kids at Bring Me Hope camp last year, I was a sobbing mess. So this time I decided I had to show them a more healthy goodbye. Also this time was different as I will see 20 of them in just over a week at camp so it's not real goodbyes.
So this morning I visited the babies for a short while. I gave lots of hugs and they all waved goodbye. I also had to say goodbye to Erin the American volunteer who has been working with the babies. Erin and I have become really good friends so that was sad. Erin is great for some comic relief or to discuss poop stories with. (Haha yep I'm serious)
Then I went to the school to say goodbye to all of those kids. I went around class by class and said goodbye to each of them individually. When I got to the class with my Jiabei in and Wendy it took a turn. I said goodbye to JB and said I would see him at camp soon. While I was doing that Wendy burst into tears. I hadn't even said goodbye to her yet. Inside I was shouting at myself don't cry don't cry. So I sat her on my lap and told her not to cry and that I'd see her in just over a week. But she kept crying. All I could do was tell her I loved her. Wendy is my little princess, which I told her too! Between crying I did manage to make her smile though! I went to say goodbye to the last group of kids and as I was finishing I hear her sobbing again. She comes over to me and sits on my lap and sobs her heart out. I'm gonna miss not seeing my princess for 11 days every morning afternoon and evening. I will miss her beautiful smile and cheeky ways! [it breaks my heart over and over again that she does not have adoption paperwork done]
I then went to get my bags to head to the bus station. I'm not gonna lie, I did cry.
And now as I'm writing this while sitting on the bus to Zhengzhou I am crying. I will be gone from most off them for 11 days but I will miss them so much. These are my kids. I'm not sure there's even a word to describe how much I love them. Totally a Gd thing.